152nd ARTICLE: My Bag of Angels

CrimeWatch Canada MagazineOctober issue

My Bag of Angels

by Glendene Grant

After over 30 months of my precious grown daughter Jessie being missing and me not knowing where she is or what is happening to her, it sometimes gets so overwhelming. When I need to be comforted or want a kiss from my other daughters or granddaughter, I can get one without too much trouble, after all...they are with me. Well, maybe not all the time, but I can talk to them and like I said, I can kiss them.

I don't have the same ease to get a kiss from Jessie or to hear her voice. I can do it, but not like my other precious grown daughters or my baby granddaughter, Maddison.

If I want a kiss from Jessie, then I have to open my bag of Angels.

Yes, I have a bag of Angels...it is a little change purse that came with a bag that I bought in Las Vegas on my first time there. It is small and cute and fits a lot of important things that I have to remind me of Jessie, or to keep my faith and hope strong for Jessie or just what others have given to me because they love me and want me to be strong while we look for Jessie.

To get my kiss, I pull out the lip-gloss that Jessie forgot at her cousin Cole and his girlfriend Amy's place in Edmonton when she went there to visit them one time before she moved back to Kamloops from Calgary. They only lived a 3 hour drive from each other and from time-to-time, Jessie and a friend would drive there for a weekend. This one time she forgot the lip-gloss in their bathroom. Amy, being the sweetheart she is, packed it up and brought it back to Kamloops when they moved back here and after Jessie went missing, Amy gave me the lip-gloss one day, telling me it was Jessie's. I was ecstatic!! I love getting things of Jessie's, pictures, etc.

You name it, I want to hold it in my hand, or like I do with some of her shoes...I put them on in the morning and I say to myself, "today I want to walk a mile in Jessie's shoes" and since I usually walk home from work every day (about an hour walk), I walk over a mile in my baby's shoes.

So now, when I want a kiss from my Jessie, I take out the lip-gloss and put it to my lips...and what once touched Jessie's lips, touch mine. It is such a wonderful feeling...I take joy in my 'kisses from Jessie'.

When I want to hear her voice, it is much sadder...I have her voicemail message recorded on my computer. It is short and bitter-sweet. All it says is, you have reached the voicemail of "Jessica". She did not say anything else, but it is definitely my daughter saying her beautiful name to me...it is music to my ears.

WHEW...I thought I was doing pretty good writing this...then for a second I stopped and then the tears started. I had to stop for a bit, but not too long. I do not have time to spend sitting around crying...Mom PI does not cry...but Mommy does. Mommy cries all the time and to completely honest with you all, when I am alone some times the pain is so great, I cry out like an animal. I have to literally make sure that my windows are closed as I do not want to scare my neighbours into thinking something else is wrong. I say 'something else' because they know that 'something' is definitely wrong in our home.

We are living with the unknown. Is Jessie alive? Is she not alive? I know I believe in my heart she is. My heartstrings are as secure and stong as ever and as secure and strong and my heartstrings to my 3 other children and grandchild.

If she is not, then God and my heart are doing all they can to protect me and to keep me strong throughout the search for my Jessie.

We will find her one day, hopefully that day will come soon, but if not...I will never give up. I will only stop when I find Jessie, or I die.

Sincerely, not just Jessie's, but also Crystal, Katie & Jennee's mom and Maddison's grandmother, Glendene.

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Jessica Edith Louise Foster
MISSING

- Jessie disappeared from North Las Vegas, Nevada between March 28th and April 3rd, 2006
- She was last seen at 1009 Cornerstone Place with her boyfriend Peter Todd. Peter, a pimp, has a prior conviction for spousal assault.
- Prior to her disappearance Jessie traveled to Nevada, New York and Florida with Donald Vaz
- She was recruited in Calgary by Yvonne Hubrechtsen to work in Las Vegas
- Jessie may have fallen victim to an international human trafficking ring

Jessie's National Crime Identification Number: M-535642358
For more information, please visit their website at http://www.jessiefoster.ca